Hash Songs

A zoomba zoomba zay A zoomba zoomba zay
Drink it down Calgary Hashers Drink it down Big Rock Beer
Drink it down Calgary Hashers Drink it down Big Rock Beer

A.B.C.D.E.F.G
Won’t you sing a song with me?
Grab a beer and raise your cup,
Lose that hat cuz it’s bad luck,
And when we say to drink it down,
Chug that beer and make a crown.

Their drinking is compulsive,
Their running is convulsive,
They’re morally repulsive,
The Hash House Harriers,
Da da da da (snap snap)

Their flatulence is rude,
Their genitals protrude,
When they’re running in the nude,
The Hash House Harriers
Da da da da (snap snap)

They’re always shiggy tracking,
From constantly bush-wacking,
Intelligence they’re lacking,
The Hash House Harriers.
Dada da da, Down down …….

Masturbation, they love masturbation
Masturbation, it’s what they love to do
First they’ll use their right hand
Then they’ll use their left hand
Right hand
Left hand
Right hand
Left hand
Masturbation, it’s what they’d rather do.
Drink it down down down down . . .

Bestiality’s best boys, bestiality’s best,
Fuck a (Insert animal),
Bestiality’s best boys, bestiality’s best.

Do you have the time
to listen to me bitch
about all the beer I brought for us?
It was a ton.
I knew we’d all have fun.
But now we’re running dry and I know why.
[to tune of song chorus]
The cooler was filled up to here (motion above head),
but these fuckers drank all the beer! (elbow toward hashers)
They drank it down, They drank it down, They drank it down, d-down down down.

Consider yourself Virgin,
Consider yourself part of the family,
We’ve taken to you so strong,
It’s clear, we’re, going to get along.
Consider yourself Virgin,
Consider yourself part of the festivities,
Just grab up your mug, don’t fear, just drink up, or wear the cold wet beer.

Dough, the stuff that buys me beer,
Ray, the one who sells me beer,
Me, the one who drinks the beer,
Far, a long way to the bar,
So, I’ll have another beer,
La-ger, lager, lager beer,
Tea, no thanks, I’ll have a beer,
And that brings us back to beer, beer, beer, beer.

Does a hasher like to walk,
Does a hasher like to run,
Does a hasher like to be where they’re having all the fun?
Can he drink a 12-ounce beer,
While his friends all sing and cheer,
Now your time has come. So drink it down, down, down . . .

Down Down Down your beer,
To pay for your crime.
Quit complaining about the taste,
There’s no sperm this time.

You can drive to the brothel,
You can drive it to the store,
The front you fill with groceries,
The back you fill with… (chorus)

Well the front is where you fuck,
And the back is where you fuck,
The front is where you fuck,
And the back is where you… (chorus)

The back rides high,
And the front rides low,
I’ll give you a free ride,
If you give me a… (chorus)

You can pay with weed,
Or you can pay with gas,
If you don’t have either,
Then you can pay with… (chorus)

How would, you like, my finger in your ear?
How would, you like, my finger in your rear?
How would, you like, my finger in your beer?
Likely, not fucking likely! Not fucking likely! Not fucking likely!

Fuck you for being the hare
Traveled down your marks and back again
Your trail is untrue
You’re a dick and incompetent

And if you did a down-down
In front of everyone you scre-ew-ewed
You would see the biggest one would be from me
And my middle finger say
Fuck you for being the hare

God bless my underpants Brand that I like
Stand inside them And ride them
Between my buns When I run or I Bike
From the waist band, to leg holes, to fly flap, wet with piss,
God bless my underpants They look, like, this.

The Grand Olde Duke of York,
He had 10,000 men.
He marched them up to the top of the hill
And marched them down again.
And when they’re up, they’re up,
And when they’re down, they’re down
And when they’re only half way up,
They’re neither up nor down down down down…

Swing low, sweet chariot,
Cumming for to carry me home (X2) CHORUS

I looked over Jordan, and what did I see, cumming for to carry me home
A band of angels, cumming after me,
cumming for to carry me home. BACK TO CHORUS

If you get there, before I do, cumming for to carry me home,
jess tell my mends, that I’m a cummin too, Cumming for to carry me home. BACK TO CHORUS

I’m sometimes up and sometimes down, cumming for to carry me home,
but still my sole feels heavenly bound, cumming for the carry me home. BACK TO CHORUS

Oh, give me a home where the hasher does roam. Where the Hare and Harriet play.
Where seldom is heard, a Puritan word, And the draft beer is cold all day.
Hash, hash, on the range,
Where the deer and antaloupe play. Where seldom is hear a Puritan word, And the draft beer is cold all day.

Hashers, meet the hashers,
We’re the biggest drunks in history,
From the town of Greenville,
We’re the leaders in debauchery.
Half minds, trailing shiggy through the years,
Watch us as we drink a lot of beers,
Down down
Down down down down
Down down down down down down down down
Down down down down down
Down down down down down down

Hashing men, they play one, they think that they’re lots of fun, *** With a knick-Knack Paddy-Whack chase them all away, Keep those hashing men at bay.
Two, they can’t get it up to screw ***
Three, they think their sex is free
Four, try and try they just can’t score,
Five, they don’t have any sex drive
Six, little men with little dicks,
Seven, masturbation is their heaven,
Eight, they can’t get their dicks up straight

(S)he ought be publicly pissed on.
(S)he ought be publicly shot, bang bang!
(S)he ought be tied to a urinal
And left to fester and rot, rot, rot, you dirty old sot
Drink it down down down

(S)he’s all right, (s)he’s all right, (s)he’s a little ….. But (s)he’s all right.
Drink it down down

Who said head?
I’ll have some of that,
So I did, and it was good
And then we fcked. We fcked for hours
Uprooting trees & shrubs & flowers,
like Vikings, with horns on our HEAD!
HEAD! Who said head?

Her left tit hangs down to her belly,
Her right tit hangs down to her knees,
If her left tit exceeded her right tit,
She’d gets lots of weenie from me!

Throw back, throw back,
Throw back them titties for me, for me.
Throw back, throw back,
Oh throw back them titties for me!

Here’s to……… (s)he’s true Blue,
(S)he’s a hasher through and through.
(S)he’s a piss pot so they say,
Tried to get to heaven,
But (s)he went the other way
Drink it down down down down…

Here’s to fellow hasher, fellow hasher, fellow hasher,
Here’s to fellow hashers may they chug-a-lug
They’re happy, they’re jolly
They’re fucked up by golly,
Here’s to fellow hashers may they chug a lug
So drink fellow hasher, drink fellow hasher, drink fellow hasher
Here’s to fellow hashers may they chug a lug

Here’s to the hares they’re true blue,
They are hashers through and through
They are piss pots so they say,
Tried to get to heaven,
But they went the other way
Drink it down down down down…

He’s the Meanest
He sucks the horse’s penis,
He’s the meanest, he’s the horse’s ass.
Ever since he found it
All he does is pound it,
He’s the meanest, he’s the horse’s ass.
He’s always pissing on us,
He’s rotten and dishonest,
He’s the meanest, he’s the horse’s ass.
So drink, chug a lug chug a lug…

His one skin hangs down to his two skin,
His two skin hangs down to his three,
His three skin hangs down to his foreskin,
His foreskin hangs down to his knee.
Roll back, roll back,
Roll back his foreskin for him, for him.
Roll back, roll back,
Oh roll back his foreskin for him.

repeat above.

I love you! You love me!
We’ll go hashing, wait and see!
With a great big mug,
And a beer from me to you!
First we’ll down down, then we’ll screw.

Running trail in the hot sun,
I ran the hash and the hash won,
I ran the hash and the hash won,
I needed beer but there was none!
I ran the hash and the hash won!

I solved no checks and it feels so bad,
Guess I’m dead fucking last!
This is the worst trail that I’ve ever ran,
I ran the hash and the hash won,
I ran the hash and the . . .

In heaven there is no beer,
That’s why we drink it here,
And when we’re gone from here,
Our friends will be drinking all the beer.

It’s a small world after all
It’s a small world after all
It’s a small world after all
It’s a small, small, world.
Drink it down down down ….

The tired [Hash Name] Hasher,
Went trudging up the hill,
Stopped at the Beer Check,
And there he drank his fill,
And when the trail was over,
His shoes were muddy brown.
Though he was drunk already,
He had to drink it down, down, down, down…

Joy to your shoes
They look so shiny and new
You thought, no one would squeal; We saw you hashing in them
With no shiggy getting in them So drink your fucking beer,
So drink your fucking beer
Now Drink
Now Drink your fucking beer.

I wish I was a little can of beer, (can of beer)
Oh I wish I was a little can of beer, (can of beer)
I’d go down with a slurp, and come up with a burp,
Oh I wish I was a little can of beer (can of beer)

Monday Hashing, Monday Hashing
Through the rain and snow and sleet.
Every Monday we go hashing
Through the streets of Calgary.
Monday Hashing, Monday Hashing
We make beer drinking a sport
PBR, Old Style, and Miller
And don’t forget Co-op.

My body lies over the ocean
My body lies over the sea
My Father lies over my mother
And that’s how they created me.

My grandfather’s cock was too long for his pants and it dragged several feet on the floor.
It was longer by half than the old man himself, yet it weighed not a penny weight more.
He had a horn on the morn of the day he was born, it was always his pleasure and pride.
But it dropped, shrank, never to rise again, when the old man died.

Put your left leg over my shoulder, Put your right leg over my shoulder, (licking motion)
Put your left tit over my shoulder, Put your right tit over my shoulder (Tap cheeks)
Put your left nut over my shoulder, Put your right nut over my shoulder (Choke choke choke)
Drink it down down down

Rubber dildo, you’re the one, You make showers lots of fun.
Rubber dildo I’m awfully fond of you, Boo Boop e doo.

Rule Britannia! Marmalade and jam!
Five Chinese crackers up yer asshole,
BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG!
Rule Britannia! Marmalade and jam!
Three Chinese crackers up yer asshole,
BANG, BANG, BANG!
Rule Britannia! Marmalade and jam!
One Chinese cracker up yer asshole,
BANG!

Sex is boring, sex is boring, pain is fun, pain is fun,
gonna cut my fingers off, gonna cut my fingers off, one by one, one by one.
Pain is boring, pain is boring, sex is fun, sex is fun,
gonna do the whole hash, gonna do the whole hash, one by one, one by one

The sexual life of a camel is stranger than anyone thinks,
At the height of the mating season, he tries to bugger the sphinx.
But the sphinx’s posterior orifice, is blocked by the sands of the Nile,
Which accounts for the hump on the camel, and the sphinx’s inscrutable smile.
Singiiiiing, bum-titty-titty bum-titty-titty, titty-bum Tra la la
Bum-titty-titty, bum-titty-titty, Yeah
Singiiiiing, bum-titty-titty bum-titty-titty, titty-bum.
The asshole is here to stay

S H I T T Y T R A I L (spell out)
Shitty Trail, (it sucked)
Shitty trail, (it really sucked)
The motherfuckers laid a shitty trail, (shitty trail)
I’d rather drink another beer that run your shitty trail
S H I T T Y T R A I L (spell out)

Sing a song of six checks,
A pocket full of flour,
Four-and-twenty hashers
Hashing for an hour.
And when they found the beer check,
There wasn’t any there.
All agreed to go On-In And lynch that goddamn hare!

Skewbic Hair
You’ve got the cutest little Skewbic Hair
There’s not another that can compare,
Skewbic Hair
Penis or vagina,
nothing could be finer than your Skewbic hair,

Asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be,
To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee,
For cunt, for cunt, for country and for KING,
Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole,
A soldier I will be.

Aye, Aye, Aye, Aye
Si Si Senora
My sister Melinda she pissed out the ‘winda,
All over my brand new sombrero

For he’s a Syphilitic bastard,
For he’s a Syphilitic bastard,
For he’s a Syphilitic BAS-TARRRD!
Which nobody can deny,
drink it down down down down.

He’s got a dose of clap on his dick.
He’s got a dose of clap on his dick,
He’s got a dose of clap on his dick,
And all it does is drip drip drip, drop drop
Drink it down down down down…

What do you do with a drunken Hasher,
What do you do with a drunken Hasher,
What do you do with a drunken Hasher,
After too many Down Downs?

Don’t look he’s peeing in the corner,
Don’t look he’s peeing in the corner,
Don’t look he’s peeing in the corner,
After too many Down-Downs!

Oh no he puked on the bar-ar,
Oh no he puked on the bar-ar,
Oh no he puked on the bar-ar,
After too many Down-Downs!

Now he’s passed out in his own vomit,
Now he’s passed out in his own vomit,
Now he’s passed out in his own vomit,
After too many Down-Downs!

Oh they wish they were a hasher with a wiener,
That is what they’d really like to be.
Cause if they were a hasher with a wiener,
They wouldn’t have to stop and squat to pee.
Drink it down down down down

This is your down down song It isn’t very long
Drink it down down down down

There’s a game called twenty toes
It’s played all over town
The women play with ten toes up
The men with ten toes down
Drink it Down down down …..

We’ve got virgins, we’ve got virgins,
At our hash, at our hash
Gonna get em drunked up, gonna get em drunked up
Down the hatch, down the hatch

What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,
What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,
What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,
What a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,
Drink it down, down, down, down…..

I see trails of true,
Poison oak too.
I hear hashers on trail,
Crying “RU?”
And I think to myself,
What a wonderful trail.
And I think to myself,
What a wonderful trail

Whip it out at the ball game,
Wave it round at the crowd,
Dip it in peanuts and crackerjacks,
I don’t care if you give it a whack,
Cause, it’s beat your meat at the ball game,
If you don’t cum it’s a shame
Cause it’s one, two, your covered in goo,
At the old ball game.

Why are we waiting, slowly masturbating
Oh why are we w a i t i n g. Oh why why why
Why are we waiting, we could be fornicating,
Oh why are we waiting , Oh why are we waiting
Oh why are we w a i t i n g Oh why why why

Why was (s)he born so beautiful, Why was (s)he born at all,
(S)he’s no fucking good to anyone, (s)he’s no fucking good at all.
(S)he might be a joy to His/Her mother
But (s)he’s a pain in the ass to us
Drink it down down down down

I put my finger in the Woodpecker’s hole, and the woodpecker said God Bless my Sole,
Pull it out, Pull it out, Pull it out,
reee-move-it
I removed my ….put it back …
reee-place-it
I replaced my…spin it around …
reee-volve-it
I revolved my…turn it back.
reee-verse-it
I reversed my…in and out.
reee-ciprocate-it
I reciprocated my…slow it down
reee-tard-it
I retarded my…let it go
reee-lease-it
I released my…pull it back.
reee-tract-it
I retracted my…let it go limp
reee-lax-it
I relaxed my…take a whiff
reee-volting.

You are my dildo, my twin speed dildo
You make me happy when skies are grey
You’ll never know dear how much I love you
Please don’t take my batteries away.

You are my hash shit, my only hash shit
You make me happy, when skies are grey,
You’ll never no dear how much I love you
Please don’t take my hash shit away